Great Caesar’s Movie Club: Superman III

Superman III has a problem – it suffers by comparison.

When the original Superman premiered in theaters, it set a standard with a nearly pitch-perfect cast led by Christopher Reeve, who seemed to embody both the Big Blue Boy Scout and mild-mannered Clark Kent. Throw in a mad scientist-style plot about sinking California into the ocean and you had what everyone expected from a movie about the Man of Tomorrow.

(True story: When I saw Superman when it opened [yes, I’m old – shut up], the audience burst into spontaneous applause the first time Clark changed into costume.)

Superman II raised the stakes, going a little darker and giving Supes a trio of Kryptonian villains who could actually give him a run for his money. Then Superman gave up his powers for Lois Lane (Margot Kidder). The Phantom Zone cons conquered the United States. Eventually Superman pulled off an amazing double-cross, beat the bad guys and used some sort of Kryptonian amnesia poke (!) to make Lois forget his secret identity – in essence giving up true love for duty. Not a dry eye in the house.

And then along came Superman III, a movie that put a lot more emphasis on humor – a misguided choice and probably a reason Richard Pryor is one of the prominent “bad guys.” (Don’t worry, he’s not really bad.) The movie even opens with a sort of Rube Goldberg series of accidents that starts with a hot woman and ends with a man nearly drowning inside his car in downtown Metropolis. At one point Clark (who’s walking to work) puts out a flaming penguin with his super-breath.

That’s when I realized: Holy shit – this movie is love letter to the Silver Age. And I’ll be damned if I don’t love it for that.

We catch up with Clark at the Daily Planet where Lois (Kidder), Jimmy Olsen (Marc McClure) and Perry White (Jackie Cooper) are basically shouting to each other. Lois is pushing for her vacation and Clark is pitching a story about going home for your high school reunion, mostly because he’s going back to Smallville for his high school reunion. They both get the thumbs-up and everyone’s off.

This lays the groundwork for new characters and a setting that’s different for the Superman movies – Lois and Perry are only in the beginning and end of the movie, while Jimmy kinda slouches along to Smallville with Clark until he manages to break his leg covering a chemical fire they come across on their way to Kansas. Superman freezes a nearby lake and uses the water to put the fire out, keeping the chemical in the factory from overheating and turning into a super-corrosive acid cloud. Then he sends Jimmy away in an ambulance and that’s it for Olsen.

Meanwhile, Gus Gorman (Pryor) is on the dole, and after getting turned down for unemployment (hey, things are tough all over, even in Metropolis) winds up in a computer programming class where he discovers he’s a computer genius. Lucky! Soon he lands a job, receives his first paycheck and WHAT THE HELL? Gus is blown away by taxes and decides to use his mad skillz to steal half-cents from the company, netting himself a check for 85 thousand bucks.

OK, brief aside: This is one of the best known devices in the movie, and has been referenced in various movies and TV shows and blah-blah-blah ever since. What’s weird though is that in Superman III the whole thing takes maybe 10 minutes. Seriously. Gus gets his money, an old coot of an accountant notices the missing money right away and alerts boss Ross Webster (Robert Vaughn), and Gus immediately drives up in a new Ferrari and is totally busted. Done and done. It was more of a plot point in Office Space, for chrissakes. Do people remember this because they love the idea of free computer money?

Anyway, Webster blackmails Gus into helping him corner the coffee and oil markets, which involves hijacking a weather satellite to make tornadoes. Together with Ross’ sister Vera and his “psychic nutritionist” Lorelei (the hot woman from the opening credits) to round things out, the group puts their plan in motion.

Ross, though, is worried that coffee-hating tornadoes might attract Superman’s attention, so he has Gus come up with some synthetic kryptonite just in case. Gus is able to break down the kryptonite recipe except for one element, but luckily he has sweet, sweet cigarettes for inspiration and fills the gap with tar.

Meanwhile, Clark catches up with the adorable Lana Lang (Annette O’Toole) at the reunion (which apparently is about a week long). I honestly don’t know why O’Toole’s Lana isn’t a bigger nerd heartthrob. Where Kidder’s Lois is perfectly tough, smart and savvy, O’Toole is wonderfully sweet, charmingly flighty and doggedly determined to better her life for herself and her young son after divorcing her husband. Plus, she’s just so damn cute!

Clark thinks so too, and spends his “reporting” time taking Lana on picnics and helping her dorky son by secretly using his powers to help him get strikes at the bowling alley. He also deflects the advances of former Smallville High football star Brad, who spends most of his time trying to impress Lana with his wonderfully trashy drunkeness.

Eventually, the gang (disguised as military officers) crash a ceremony honoring Superman and they lay the fake kryptonite on him. And …nothing happens. At least nothing obvious, but we begin to see changes in Superman that lead to one of the greatest things to happen to cinema:

Asshole Superman.

The krypto-not starts changing Superman’s personality; he begins hitting lustily on Lana, then he straightens out the Leaning Tower of Pisa and blows out the Olympic Torch. Yes, it’s true – Superman’s a dick.

For an encore he goes to a bar and starts drinkin’, flicking peanuts with his super-strength and destroying all the whiskey and Courvoisier in the joint. Angry with himself, Superman flies off and ends up in a junkyard where he SPLITS UP INTO CLARK KENT AND ASSHOLE SUPERMAN. And then he starts a fistfight with himself, alternately throwing junk at himself and throwing himself into junk. At one point a trash compactor is involved.

Clark finally chokes Asshole Superman into submission, making him fade away and letting Clark be Good Guy Superman again. Which is a good thing, because while all this has been going on Ross Webster has been building a super-computer to Gus’ specifications and since Gus is a genius the computer of course becomes SELF-AWARE (like those kids on The Hills).

And it’s got a kryptonite ray, so bad news for Superman. But luckily Gus (see, I told you he’s not really a bad guy) takes an ax to the ray. Things really get crazy then, as the super-computer starts draining power from the grid and the cavern (did I mention the super-computer was built in a cavern? At the bottom of the Grand Canyon?) gets sparky. Everyone escapes but Vera, who gets pulled into the computer and comes out a cyborg. A motherf’n cyborg!

Another brief aside: When I mentioned I’d be watching this movie, a lot of people would tell me how the Vera-cyborg scared the crap out of them when they were kids. This is because the Vera-cyborg is messed up. Yeah, yeah, when you look at it now it’s easy to dismiss it as spray-painted cardboard and stray alligator clips, but it’s still weird and creepy and uuugh. I both love and am repelled by the Vera-cyborg.

As a cyborg Vera has all sorts of nutty powers … well, really, she mostly uses an energy beam to stick her brother and Lorelei to the cave walls like grocery lists with 80s-style haircuts. Things are getting out of hand, so Superman flies to the chemical lab and comes back with (wait for it … waaaiit for it …) the acid he kept from vaporizing earlier!

With all the electricity arcing around the acid quickly overheats, destroying the computer (yay!) and turning Vera back to her normal self (huh?). Superman sends the cops to pick up the Websters and Lorelei, but takes Gus to get a job at a coal mine. Yeah, I don’t know either. Then Superman goes home, where Lana has gotten a job as a secretary at the Daily Planet and The End.

Let’s be clear about one thing: Superman III is certainly not the best Superman movie out there. It’s not even the second best. The movie leans heavily on the comedic side of the fence, which often falls flat. Richard Pryor is wasted here (well, not wasted … you know what I mean). The movie feels like a few really inspired scenes loosely stitched together and wrapped in awkward.

But that doesn’t mean I don’t like it. Those few really inspired scenes are great, and have become iconic in their own small way. Christopher Reeve continued to bring the goods in spite of the script, and Annette O’Toole was the perfect choice for gentle but strong-willed Lana. All together it’s a disjointed, high-concept and bat-shit crazy jumble – which means it’s a live-action version of a Silver Age Superman comic. It’s a lot of fun if you’re willing to go along for the ride. And if that ride includes Superman-Clark junkyard fights and wide-eyed killer cyborgs, then I’m in.

…

Movie Clubbin’!

Hectic Engine

Reminder: Movie Club deadline is TODAY

Hello, Movie Clubbers!

It’s been a month since Superman III was announced as our first selection for Great Caesar’s Movie Club, and it’s time to get those reviews in – send me an e-mail, let me know in the comments, or have a singing telegram delivered (I love those!), but get those links to me. We’ll call the cut-off time … oh, let’s say 8 p.m. today. I’ll post my review tomorrow, along with links back to yours, and I’ll also be announcing the next Movie Club selection. Exciting!

So get to it! Remember – a life could be at stake!

Send links to maxoromero[at]gmail[dot]com

Remember, remember, the … 19th of July?

Man, that doesn’t work at all.

But! It does serve as a handy reminder that this Monday (July 19th) is the deadline to get in your reviews of Superman III, our first selection for the Great Caesar’s Movie Club.

I’m excited! Aren’t you excited? Even Lana’s excited:

Get those reviews in and we’ll answer the age-old question – Lois or Lana?

Harvey Pekar (1939-2010)

I don’t think Harvey Pekar set out to redefine a segment of comic book storytelling. I don’t think he planned to become the example others would follow, in both style and tone.  And I seriously doubt Pekar ever meant to become a legend.

The fact that he accomplished all of those things, primarily with an unflinching dedication to honesty that he shared with his audience, is a testament to his impact and importance as a writer and collaborator. The news of his death today at the age of 70 is a loss for the industry and for the countless readers who learned to see more than the mundane in everyday life thanks to his unfiltered stories.

Pekar was the kind of writer you hear about but so rarely see; someone who saw stories all around him, glimpsed the extraordinary in the ordinary, and who would then share – who seemed to NEED to share – what he saw with others. Often those stories were awkward. Sometimes they were even difficult to read. But, in the best way possible, they were always real.

From American Splendor to Our Cancer Year to The Quitter and everything in between and since, Pekar helped define and advance indie comics and the autobiographical genre. Anyone who has tried to tell a story taken from or even set in real life since Pekar first appeared on the underground comix scene has been influenced by him (whether they know it or not).

The genre – indeed, the medium – owes a debt of gratitude to Harvey Pekar. We’ll never see another like him.

Keep on truckin’

So, this  comic book blog has been pretty short on comic booky content lately (and it’s about to happen again), but there’s a light at the end of the tunnel and things should be back on track soon.

(I swear I didn’t do that last part on purpose.)

I also hate to see the Post going dormant for so long, so I just wanted to give you an update on what’s happening here at ol’ Rancho Maxo. The boxes are packed (mostly), the truck is loaded and on Wednesday we begin the three-day drive from Austin to Delaware, where I’ve never been and where I’ll be moving to for at least the next few years. Adventure!

Speaking of which, does anyone have any tips for driving through Tennessee? So far all my wife and I have been able to come up with is plastering the car with Confederate flag stickers, blasting “Sweet Home Alabama” and driving like hell.

Speaking of speaking of things, I’ll also be trying to spot-blog about the trip on Twitter as much as endurance, time and wi-fi connections will allow. Follow along, why don’cha? I’m almost positive I’m going to insist on being called “Snowman,” so it should be fun.

And seriously, I’ll be talking about comics again very soon.

No, seriously.

News from the front

As you might have noticed (since I’ve been mentioningit at every opportunity), I’m in the middle of moving. Specifically I’m moving from Austin, Texas to just outside Wilmington, Delaware in just under a week.

If you’re picturing rooms filled with boxes, stacks of furniture and piles of random stuff, you’re not far off.  And if you think this has kept me from posting lately – actually, from doing anything much beyond cramming things into cardboard boxes – you’d be right on the money. In the meantime, I hope you’ll hang in there.

See you in Delaware!

…

Speaking of comics, I picked up Superman #700 this week and was left … underwhelmed. I don’t have it on hand for reference (things in boxes, remember?), but the impression I was left with was feeling a little lost in the story. I wasn’t keeping up with the War of the Supermen-slash-Fall of Krypton stories, and the chapters definitely felt like continuations of plots that were a mystery to me. The J. Michael Straczynski storyline begins here, and having Superman walk across America is fun in a Hard Travelin’ Heroes kind of way, but the clunky heavy-handedness of the introduction in this issue makes me a little leery. Also, can Superman get a strong, distinctive artist? Please.

Pleeeeze?!

…

Don’t forget, the Great Caesar’s Movie Club due date is July 19! Superman III! Do it!

Announcing – Great Caesar’s Movie Club!

Here’s something the average person might not realize about comic book geeks: We’re usually geeks about a lot of other things, too.

For instance, I’ve noticed that a lot of my fellow comic bloggers are also big movie fans, with passions ranging from genre films to black-and-white classics and including everything in between. I’m no different – I love movies, and just like with comics, I love to talk about them and hear other people’s opinions. So, with that in mind I give you a new feature here at GCP:

GREAT CAESAR’S MOVIE CLUB!

Here’s how it works:

Once a month I’ll announce the current movie club selection, along with a due date. If you’d like to participate, write a review and post it to your own website on that date (with a link to Great Caesar’s Post), drop me an e-mail telling me about it, and I’ll link back to it here. It’s so easy an actor playing a caveman could do it!

Of course, there’s no obligation to play – if you do a review one month, you don’t have to review the next month’s selection if you don’t feel like it (jerk).

What kind of movies can you expect? Well, I’m a fan of the Swedish school of postmodernism as much as the next guy, but in this case I’m going to try to keep selections in the sci-fi/cult/Weird category. Superhero movies probably won’t show up too much, just because those are a well-covered subject already, but in honor of this blog’s inspiration the first movie club pick is:

SUPERMAN III

Oh, yeah – the one with drunk Superman.

It’s also the one featuring a weirdly cast Richard Pryor, a fight between Superman and Clark Kent, and Annette O’Toole as the One True Lana. Superman III is available on the Netflix, so get to it!

Here are the details:

Great Caesar’s Movie Club!

Now showing: Superman III (1983)

Due date: Monday, July 19

Clothing: Optional

By the way, if you get around to the horror movie part of Blogger Town you might notice that this is very similar (some might say identical) to the format used by Stacie Ponder over at the excellent, you-should-be-reading-it Final Girl. Stacie has given me the very generous thumbs-up (seriously, you should see the size of her thumbs) to crib the format, because she’s cool like that. Thanks again, Stacie!

Jam-packin’

If you’ve been following the Post since the old days (y’know … last week), then you might know that I’m in the process of moving from my current home in Austin to a new start in Delaware. Right now that mostly means being neck-deep in my least favorite part of moving – the packing.

Oooh, packing, how I hate you! Hold on, give me a second so I can go shake my fist at it.

OK, I’m back. So yeah, packing is a lot of ugh as far as I’m concerned. Still, it can have some perks now and then – particularly when my wife asks me to finally gather all the random, free-range comics from the various cubby holes I’ve let them nest in.

In the end I found issues in almost every room of the apartment – the living room, the office, both bathrooms (shut up), the bedroom and (surprisingly enough) the linen closet.

I can’t be the only one who leaves comics scattered all over the house, right? I think I’ve mentioned it before, but I don’t bag-and-board and climate-control and all that; I’m more of a reader than a collector. And for better or worse, that means I leave comics behind me like Hansel dropping hoagies.

(Wow, that sounds so much worse out loud.)

All in all it didn’t turn out to be as many as I thought it was going to be, but it was still enough to fill another long box. And I only stopped to read a comic, like, twice.

I swear.

Ahem.

Adventures in Sound #21

See Adventures in Sound 1-20 in the archive!

Rounding up some random comic book thoughts

Since I’ve been more or less inactive for the past few weeks, there has been some random comic book news floating around in my head that I’ll now share with you, all bullet-list style.

(If you’re going to do a list, it might has well be of high-caliber. *snert* Oh, I crack myself up.)

So I was disappointed to hear about the cancellation of Unknown Soldier, which will be ending with issue #25. The Vertigo book has been one of my favorite titles since its debut, thanks in large part to writer Joshua Dysart’s slow-burn story of one man’s tortured psyche smoldering away in the war-ravaged country of Uganda in 2002.

Dysart’s use of the brutality in Uganda to update the Bronze Age character has been masterful, and gives full dimension to the mysteriously lethal and psychologically damaged Dr. Moses Lwanga. The art was always solid, and I also appreciated the essays on what Uganda was like during this time that Dysart included in most issues. The scope of the real-life events helped give the story perspective, as well as being just a solid serving of information I think most American readers probably missed the first time around.

I’ve always wished more comics could  be like Unknown Soldier, and I’m disappointed that there’ll be one less now.

HTMLComics.com dared the U.S. Department of Justice to shut it down for copyright infringment, saying that even though full issues of comics were being made available at the website for free and without permission, it was acting as a library and nyah nyah nyah.

Can you guess what happened?

I’ll be honest: I’ve downloaded things from shady sites. I’m not proud of it. But I will say (and here come the excuses) that it has always been a temporary fix – once I confirmed the storyline, found the single panel I was looking for, or read enough to decide whether I wanted to read more or not, the download was deleted. Period.

If I’m reading something regularly, or even if there is a back issue I want to own, I go out and buy it. Downloading because you don’t want to actually pay for something is stealing, and it hurts the artists and writers we as fans claim to love so much. Eventually it hurts the industry, which in turn will end up hurting the reader who suddenly is looking at yet another price hike for comics with less content and more ads.

Does the contradiction make me a hypocrite? Probably. Is there some sort of middle ground? You tell me. (Seriously – I’m interested in everyone’s opinion on this).

Finally, there was the sad and shocking news about the murder of ThunderCats writer Stephen Perry.

Perry (who also wrote the comics Timespirits, Psi-Force and Wally Wood’s THUNDER Agents) had been missing and the evidence, including a severed arm and then other dismembered body parts, painted a grim picture. Perry was unfortunately going through a hard time in his life, but had been getting some support from the Hero Initiative and seemed to be getting back on track.

Sadly, it was a recovery that was senselessly cut short.